Imagine you are in the middle of the ocean. You are without a boat. You are without a life jacket. Your arms and legs are pumping and kicking and you can feel your own exhaustion added to the weight of your body, pulling you under. You hear a voice "Just relax" and you know that if you do allow your body to go limp you can float on the water and give your muscles the relief that they're screaming for. But you also know that if you do "just relax" your mind will turn to what may or may not be lurking below. And while you're wondering if something is down there waiting for you, you're slowly moving with the water...farther away from shore.
Welcome to infertility. Each month individuals and couples find themselves back out to sea-exhausted, anxious, full of fear of the unknown. It can be crippling. And it can be difficult for those who have never experienced infertility to fully know how to support someone struggling with wanting to have a baby, but not being able to. Or, being able to get pregnant but not stay pregnant. So well meaning loved ones say things like "just relax." But you know better.
Struggling to get pregnant can be a lonely road to be on. If you're not careful it can be damaging to your well being, your relationship with your partner and those well meaning friends who don't always know what to say.
This time in your life is stressful enough. Be intentional about giving yourself what you need right now and be intentional about nurturing and caring for yourself. Here are some ways you can get started. If you're taking good care of yourself and are still struggling--reach out.
Is someone you love struggling with infertility? Here are some resources for family and friends.